The situation: Six and a half hours to kill until midnight flight to London. Already flown from Denpasar that morning - on Air Asia which I booked before the pact never to fly them again.
Passport? Check
Credit cards? Check
Luggage? Check
Travel companion? Check
Trusty iPad for amusement purposes? Ahhh, no.
Cos on Thursday afternoon, I left my iPad in the back of a motherfu&@ing taxi!!!! Goodbye iPad, my friend. Sadly, all those hours Phil spent downloading 2 seasons of Community at the woefully slow "high speed" Internet cafe in Bali - gone. All my emails (still being pushed to the iPad) no longer so private. And most irritating for you, my dear readers, several incompleted saved blog posts as well as countless other notes, info etc.
The disappearance of the notes is, without question, the most irritating part. I'd been keeping a journal of sorts every day on this trip, so I could look back and remember not only the highlights of the trip, but just the stuff we did day to day. All gone. Three months worth. Phil had been urging me to put the notes in a program that backed them up online, but I didn't know how to use the program, so... I didn't. And now I'm feeling like an idiot...
How did it happen you ask?? In our last week in Bali I've been frantically trying to redecorate the Bali apartment because after the earthquake earlier this ear, it needed patching and a new paint job. But the new white walls left it looking a little prison-cell bereft of colour. So, a few days of shopping later and I'd bought cushions, curtains, table runners, furniture, plants, decorative stuff that eludes sensible description. And all that was left was to pick 2 paintings for the walls and the job would be done. If you've been to Bali, you would know that it fancies itself an artistic island and there is a roaring trade in paintings. They're sold on the beach, on villages, in art markets, in street stalls, in galleries - you can take your pick.
How did it happen you ask?? In our last week in Bali I've been frantically trying to redecorate the Bali apartment because after the earthquake earlier this ear, it needed patching and a new paint job. But the new white walls left it looking a little prison-cell bereft of colour. So, a few days of shopping later and I'd bought cushions, curtains, table runners, furniture, plants, decorative stuff that eludes sensible description. And all that was left was to pick 2 paintings for the walls and the job would be done. If you've been to Bali, you would know that it fancies itself an artistic island and there is a roaring trade in paintings. They're sold on the beach, on villages, in art markets, in street stalls, in galleries - you can take your pick.
Unfortunately many, well, most paintings are ugly, ugly, ugly. Ugly. Really ugly. And the ones that aren't start at $900 each. Which is undoubtedly great value for nice work. But I'm not looking to start a collection, just fill some wall space, so after looking for days at a bunch of ugly paintings, I was thrilled to find a couple of nice paintings at reasonable prices at a gallery a few kms away from the apartment on our last full day in Bali. I went in and chose the paintings. Easy. Paid for the paintings. Easy. Arranged for the paintings to be delivered. Not so easy - no delivery service! In a place where you generally can get anything delivered.
Okay, maybe they'll fit in a taxi?? So I take these two huge and heavy paintings out into the street. It's 36 degrees. And after flagging down a taxi and trying several creative angles, I confirm that they do not fit in the taxi. A local guy who watched the whole taxi saga comes up and tells me I need a motorbike... And he has one! He brings his motorbike over and tells me to sit on the back, holding the paintings in front of me, and he'll drive me home. I even briefly got on the back to give it a try but with the paintings in hand, there were no hands left to hold on!! I could just see me falling off the back, head all caved in like a watermelon. So I asked him if he had a friend who could help out... He didn't, but the seed of the plan had been planted...
Fifteen hot and sweaty minutes later, I'd found two guys with a motorbike who had agreed to ride the paintings back. Of course there was a small hitch - they didn't know where the apartments where. So I suggest taking a taxi back that the motorbike can follow. Excellent, a plan that might work! Plus, air conditioning in the taxi - thank god!!
The traffic in Bali is pretty awful at the best of times, and (I'm pretty sure I wasn't imagining it) this was the worst traffic I've ever seen. The trip which usually takes ten minutes took over thirty and I spent the whole trip watching the poor guys weaving through traffic, holding the two paintings from the back window. When the taxi finally pulled up at the apartment, I literally leapt out of the back of the taxi to relieve the guys of the paintings, paid them double what we'd agreed, put the paintings against a wall, rushed back to pay the waiting taxi driver through the front passenger side window and let him drive away. With the motherfu&@$ng iPad in the back.
Aaaaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhhhhh... Fuuuuuuuccccckkkkkk!!!
It took me ten minutes to realise what had happened and once it did... Well, I could repeat the whole tirade that followed, but it would just be six straight lines of non-sequitur swearing. I'm sure you can imagine it for yourself.
On the upside, the new paintings look great...
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